Sunday, November 18, 2007

Positive Aspect of Negative Thinking

So yesterday was my choir's first performance. The performances from the other choirs were, shall we say, very interesting. I sat with Georgette the director and she was making fun of all of them, and making me almost piss myself laughing. That would have looked good on stage wouldn't it? Anyway, as we were driving to the concert, which was in Brockville, Mom pointed out to me that I speak very negatively lately. Mostly about people and their character flaws. I'm really critical of a lot of people and things they do or don't do. And as much as my mother can be really harsh sometimes, I think she has a point. I don't know how long I've been like this, or if it just developped since I came home or what, but I've noticed myself doing it a lot, and I don't know why. It's always "This person has no job" or "This person is so stupid cuz of this reason". Mom told me that for everyone who I can't stand I need to think of at least one positive thing about them. Maybe she's right. I think it's easier said than done though. I just hope I'm not a total bitch. I remember telling a friend awhile back that she was pretty negative and she really should try to think more positively, and I found out later that that was pretty hurtful to her. But maybe I'm turning into a sinical bitch. I'm not saying my friend ever was a sinical bitch either. She was going through a hard time, and I was a bitch for saying what I said, and I still kick myself in the ass for it, because that person is one of my all time best friends. She listens to my crap on an almost daily basis, and yet back then, I wasn't willing to hear all of her's. But I feel like I'm being a super bitch, and I'm not sure how to train myself out of that. So I'm sorry if I've been super negative lately. I really do want to work on changing my outlook, because I don't want to be a sinical bitch. Honestly, I'm not usually such an angry person... at least I don't think I am...


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