08 Will Get Better I'm Sure

Oh wow. For once, I'm actually the one who's doing ok. Man, I'm so lucky to have the things I do. My cousin Becky and I were talking awhile ago and she told me about her theory about being born with two bags. The first bag is full of luck. The second is full of experience. You have to gain as much experience and put it into your bag as you can before your bag of luck runs out. I know a two people who's bags of luck have run out of that luck. But their bag of experience seems to be doing really well.

First, there's Becky. I can't believe that she has had not one, but two battles with Cancer, and won! She really inspires me. It was her mother who taught me how to do all those things you do when you're a baby. I guess her title was infant stimulation worker. And ever since then, our families have been really close. I used to spend a week every other summer with them, and man did we have some good times. Becky and I used to go for walks, and she was the first one who's name I knew. I love them all deeply, and I have a really amazing respect for Becky for having such a strong will to live. When I moved back home in October, I talked to Becky on the phone, and we promissed to be a team. Whenever either of us needed anything, we said we'd call each other and talk. I sorta feel bad. I feel like I call her a lot to wine about my problems, and I rarely if ever hear her wine about her's. But Becky is really special.

And then, there is my dear friend Terri Terri has had less than fabulous experiences with room mates and apartments and drama and all that. Her new year did not start out the greatest. I won't go into details, but she's having a really rough time. But she's being really strong and I know she's going to get through it. I love her very dearly, and I think she's a very strong person. She has not lived at home since she was 16, but she's all right. She was one of three people who were right by my side for most of the summer after Jay and I ended things. That was a really tough time for me, and Jessica, Jesse and she were all there for me. They were really amazing, and Terri is fabulous.

So I look at all the stupid things that I wine about. I don't want to live at home anymore. I'm tired of being stuck here. But I'm really lucky to have what I have. There are a lot of people who have it worse off than me. So I'm not really sure how to end this, I just think that even though we might have it really shitty sometimes, we are really lucky other times to have what we have. I'm really thankful for that.